Category: Infertility

overcoming infertility

Overcoming Infertility: A Real-Life Story (Part 2)

Amanda is a 21st century overcomer. Last week, many of you were so excited by her story of overcoming infertility that you couldn’t wait to read “the rest of the story.” Well here it is! 🙂  And in case you missed Part 1, you can read it HERE.

I know her experience in coming out of the season of infertility will encourage you!


Overcoming Infertility: Amanda’s Story (Part 2)

I had the opportunity to attend a fertility retreat hosted by Evangeline and meet her in person. I had been trying to figure out the scripture from Exodus 23:25-26 for months by the time I attended. The part I got stuck on was, “You shall serve only the Lord.” I felt like I was already serving “only” the Lord, so then why did the promise of “no miscarriages”, not apply to me? Evangeline shared a picture that hit at the truth. She said, “you have truths in your head that you read or hear and believe, but they don’t connect with your heart and thus don’t “feel” real. But the thing between your head and your heart is your mouth. You’ve got to speak His promises.”

Speak God’s Promises of Fertility

God wants us to partner with Him. That’s why He gives us promises that belong to us because of what Jesus did for us, but He wants us to own them by speaking them. Equally true, we can speak lies that feed our hearts as well. I started this journey by speaking over myself the lie that “I’d be better off not being a mom, because I’d screw them up” and later agreed with the lie that I had “bad eggs.” To answer my above question, the truth was I probably wasn’t serving “only” the Lord, because I was doing things (seeking answers) in my own power, but more importantly I wasn’t standing on His truth. There were things that I knew about His character, His love, His plans, His timing, but didn’t “feel” them as real and thus I turned to worldly science instead of Him.

For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God. ~2 Corinthians 1:20

If He has made a promise, His answer is “Yes” in Christ, but we have to agree. God has promised us our hearts desires if we take delight in Him (Psalm 37:4). What better way to do that than to agree with Him? If you haven’t already, look at the number of times that God promised that we won’t be barren and the number of women throughout history who stood on these promises and overcame infertility. It is truly amazing!

Armed with New Weapons for Overcoming Infertility

I left the retreat with a new arsenal of weapons to use against the enemy. I started seeking out God’s promises and speaking them over my life. Instead of questioning Exodus, I just started declaring that the promise of no miscarriages was for me. I fired the infertility clinic and found a new believing doctor that heard my story and the first thing he said was “well it looks like we’re getting closer each time”, a shockingly hopeful statement. I took a full-time job, because I figured based on my previous track record, it would be a while before I got pregnant. God had different plans.

The Blessing Manifested

I tested positive at the beginning part of August 2014 and fear set in hard. It’s easier to speak out truth than it is to walk it out and I entered into a full on war with the devil. I stood on Exodus, shaking, tears flowing down my blubbering face on more than one occasion. We held off on blood work and ultrasounds until 9 weeks, because we didn’t want any “fact” to interfere with God’s truth. If there was going to be life, there would be evidence without doubt by 9 weeks. That was the longest 5 weeks of my life, but on September 10, 2014, there was a beautifully strong, pounding heart beat and a little bean with nubs wiggling away on the screen. Four weeks later he had grown full arms, legs, hands, fingers, feet and toes and the reality finally kicked in, this was my promise. On April 13, 2015, Samuel David Roberts was born  8 lb.-11 oz and 21 inches long.

He has since blossomed into a gentle, joyful, and BIG boy. He just turned one, is weighing almost 30 pounds, and is just shy of 3 ft. tall.

He is amazing. My husband and I are repeatedly lost for words about how awesome he is. He gives us a reason to be thankful every single day and now we get to be thankful for his sister who is due in September. 🙂

Overcoming infertility-Amanda's ultrasound
Evangeline’s reaction: “Baby Girl looks like she’s being cradled in Jesus’ hands!”

Final Thoughts of Encouragement

I’ll leave you with this: I know the choke hold that the lie of infertility can have on your faith, your trust, and your ability to fight. I know there are times when you think there is no fight left, but if I can encourage you with one thing, it is that God knows and He’s not done! The enemy might get to have this season for a time, but if you have a desire to be a mother, God gave it to you and He has a plan to make it a reality. Stand on and speak this truth over your life!

Many blessings to a home filled with the pounding of little feet and squeals of laughter throughout.

Overcoming infertility-family pictureWith Love-

Chris, Amanda, Samuel and Baby girl Roberts

 


Overcoming infertility is possible! For more encouragement so that you can stand on God’s promises, read
A Seed of Hope: God’s Promises of Fertility. 

Overcoming infertility-A Seed of Hope

Infertility battle -STAND

The Infertility Battle – You are NOT Condemned to Lose

The infertility battle is not one that you are condemned to lose. Even though month after month the challenge at hand may feel like you’ll never see the end of it, when you look at what God has said about it, you’ll see that things are not as He would have them to be.

How can you win the infertility battle when it feels like it will never end?

Here are some tips to put you on the path to experience victory:

  1. Discover, remember, and speak God’s promises of fertility (Joshua 1:8).
  2. God’s Word says that nothing is too hard for Him so infertility is not too hard for Him (Genesis 18:14).
  3. Worship the Lord, keeping your mind focused on Jesus’ love so that you can enjoy His soothing peace (Isaiah 26:3).
  4. Believe God. God does not lie, His promises are true. Not one word of God’s promises will ever fail you (1 Kings 8:56).
  5. Persevere; use the Word like Jesus did (Matthew 4:4).
  6. Choose to use your words to speak Life to your life. Speak (out loud) God’s Word to your circumstances (Proverbs 18:21).
  7. Anchor your hope in the truth of God’s Word. He has a plan for you and it is all good (Jeremiah 29:11)!
  8. Resist the devil’s attempt to make you doubt God’s integrity (James 4:7).
  9. Speak to the mountain and tell it to move out of your life (Mark 11:23).
  10. Allow God’s Word to be THE source of life in everything you do. His words are health to all your flesh (Proverbs 4:20-22).

Surrender your fertility to God.

I recently heard Minister Erica Moore teach about how Hannah, an infertile woman in Bible, gave her child to God even before she got pregnant (1 Samuel 1). Her surrender of what she deeply desired was an act of trust in God. Hannah did not allow that desire to become an idol; it would not be something that displaced God from first place in her mind and heart. She chose focus on God more than she focused on having a baby. This act of surrender was an act of generosity as well as an act of worship.

“I give you my fertility as a gift of generosity.” ~ Erica Moore, as she prayed to have a child in 2014

Erica prayed that prayer because she desired to have another child. Circumstances didn’t appear that it would likely happen. However, months later, Erica was pregnant! She has since given birth to a beautiful baby girl.

Victory was found in the surrendering!


Reign in Life

You’ve been graced to reign in life (Romans 5:17). You can face this infertility battle with confidence, knowing that God is there with you. You are NOT condemned to lose. Stand your ground speaking and believing His Word, knowing that He’s fighting your battle so that you can be victorious.

When you get in synch with God’s Word, you experience a higher frequency and higher level of victory!

For more about how to have a victorious mindset and experience victory in all areas of life, get my book, Live to Win.

 

Mother's Day

Mother’s Day 2016 – It’s a Good Day to Make it a Good Day

This is a revised reprint of a previous Mother’s Day post. My thoughts about how to deal with the emotions this day brings haven’t changed so I thought I’d share it again. I hope it encourages you!


When I was on the frontline of the battle against infertility, Mother’s Day was difficult to celebrate. Of course, I honored my own mother but something inside me yearned for the ability to celebrate it with my own child.

I wanted to experience pregnancy. I wanted to watch my tummy grow. I wanted to feel the baby kicking and moving inside of me. I wanted to be the one who could console my child when no one else could. But it wasn’t happening…

Getting Through Mother’s Day

Thankfully, I had a husband who was understanding and got me through the Day without tears (he was good at distracting me and making me laugh). And I had a mother who encouraged me to never give up hope.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.” ~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Even though Dr. King was referring to the Civil Rights struggle, it is applicable to this personal struggle of dealing with childlessness. With infertility, the finite disappointment rolls around on a monthly basis, but don’t allow it to make you lose hope in God’s promises of fertility. Don’t let the doctor’s diagnosis make you lose hope for having a child. There’s a spiritual enemy, the devil, that would love for you to give up on Jesus–don’t let him win. Hope is what gets us through the tough times. Always base your hope on Jesus’ for love you. I overcame infertility because I did not lose hope…I did not give up on God’s promises.

Childlessness can drain you emotionally, if you let it. It can sink you into great despair, if you let it. I encourage you to find creative ways to maintain ongoing, infinite hope. Choose to make the Day a good day.

Stay in the Word…allow Jesus’ love to speak to you through it. Need some suggestions for some applicable verses to read? There are plenty of them included in my YouVersion Infertility Bible Reading Plan.

If you’re in the throes of infertility, how difficult is this day for you? Where is your focus?

I encourage you to look to Jesus. Make Him the object of your focus. It’s the promises of fertility found in Him–the Word–that can keep you hope-filled!

Looking away from all that will distract us and focusing our eyes on Jesus, who is the Author and Perfecter of faith [the first incentive for our belief and the One who brings our faith to maturity], who for the joy of accomplishing the goal set before Him endured the cross, disregarding the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God
[revealing His deity, His authority, and the completion of His work].
 ~Hebrews 12:2 Amplified Bible

 

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles | FreeDigitalPhotos.net

NIAW 2016

National Infertility Awareness Week–Ask Questions During NIAW!

It’s NIAW! There are lots of questions being asked about infertility this week in an effort to raise awareness. Hopefully there are many conversations being started about infertility’s impact on women, marriages, and families.

I want you to consider asking a question from a spiritual standpoint:

Ask God what it is that you still need to see in His Word so that you can believe He has already delivered you from the yoke of infertility.

His Word is able to change any impossibility into…I know I should say “possibility” here but a possibility does not convey the certainty and firmness of receiving what you’re desiring. What you want is not just a possibility. What you want is what He has promised–that none would be barren (Deuteronomy 7:13-14).

Here’s an excerpt from my soon-to-be-released book, Live to Win!, that may shed some light on asking God:

Ask God, knowing He’s the One who loves you like no other. Ask Him with confidence that He is not only able to meet your needs but He is also willing to do so in abundance. God is Spirit and He tells us that He has ears that hear with excellent clarity (Psalm 27:7). When you call to Him, He hears you. He always keeps His promises and His power and goodness are always available—just ask!

Scripture says in 1 John 5:14 that when we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. The Bible is His will. So if God said it in the Bible, you can ask Him for it in Jesus’ name, and you can have confidence that He has heard you. Verse 15 goes on to say that if we know that He has heard us, then we can know that we have what we have asked of Him.

So during NIAW, ask practical questions about your health to your health care provider and ask how you can help encourage someone else suffering with the disease of infertility. Ask your government officials how they can help prod insurance companies to give better health care coverage. Ask your employer how they can get involved in the NIAW movement.

BUT MOST OF ALL, ask God where your answer is in His Word. He will be faithful to show it to you when you take the time to ask, listen, and then look for it.  Ask what it is in His Word that will meet your need and change your circumstances.

NIAW  #StartAsking

What Truth Do You Believe About Overcoming Fertility?

What do you believe about overcoming fertility? It’s so easy to believe the negative reports about infertility. We humans are trained through our normal, everyday situations to focus on and remember the negative circumstances of life. But what if there were powerful reasons to believe something radically different from the medical reports and the advice/counsel you get from friends and family?

 Believe His Promises

Would you believe?

Here are three powerful reasons to believe that you are already blessed and empowered to overcome infertility:

  1. God said none will be barren/infertile, not male or female.
    • “You will be blessed more than any other people; none of your men or women will be childless.” Deuteronomy 7:14 NIV
  2. God said ALL things are possible with Him  and impossible without Him.
    • “For nothing is impossible with God. Luke 1:37 NLT
    • I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5 NIV
  3. God said He is always with you and His Spirit bears witness to the Truth (Truth=what God has said). His Word is truth.
    •  “And Jesus Christ was revealed as God’s Son by his baptism in water and by shedding his blood on the cross–not by water only, but by water and blood. And the Spirit, who is truth, confirms it with his testimony.” 1John 5:6 NLT
    • “Make them holy by your truth; teach them your word, which is truth.” John 17:17 NLT

Be assured that no word from God will ever fail or be void of power (Luke 1:37 NIV and ASV). We’re also told in 1 Kings 8:56 that “not one word has failed of all the wonderful promises He gave.”

Will you believe that His promises of fertility are your truth?

 

facebook infertility group

You’re Not Alone– Join Our Facebook Group

Are you feeling alone as you struggle with infertility? Join our Facebook group!

I am excited to invite you to join A Seed of Hope fertility support group, a “Closed” Facebook group created to serve women looking to overcome infertility. Fertility solutions can be found in God’s Word and this group will serve to encourage you  and help you find hope in God’s Word and His promises of fertility.

Living with infertility can leave you feeling isolated, with no one to talk to who really understands the reality of it. By being a part of this group, you won’t have to walk this journey alone.

  • Connect with like-minded women who understand the unique challenge of infertility.
  • Anchor yourself in the hope found in God’s Word so you can diminish doubt and not give up.
  • Share stories and be inspired to take positive action during this season of infertility.

This group is unique in that we will address the spiritual aspect of infertility and will look to God’s Word for encouragement, direction, and hope. I will moderate the group, occasionally posing questions to foster more confidence in God’s promises of fertility.

Come join us on Facebook. Simply request to become a member. Become an active part of this uplifting community!

IMPORTANT: If you have any difficulty with initiating a request to join the group, email me at Evangeline@EvangelineColbert.com to let me know of your desire to join. Then I can send you the Facebook invitation.

Image courtesy of Apolonia | Freedigitalphotos.net

3 Things to Do About Perpetual Pain

PainThe pain of infertility can be excruciating. As I stated in my book, A Seed of Hope: God’s Promises of Fertility, I found the pain of infertility to be worse than the pain of birthing a long-awaited baby via vaginal delivery! For some of you, infertility seems to be perpetual. It’s something you’ve lived with for so long and you don’t see the end in sight. The pain of it never fully goes away and is influenced by what (babies) and who (pregnant friends) you see daily. Well, I want to encourage you with something that you may not have considered before.

Yesterday, during my morning quiet time, I was looking for a scripture about healing and came across Jeremiah 15:15-20. This passage turned my quiet time an eye-opening and exciting experience in the Word! The scripture is not one that directly addresses infertility but it definitely can be applied to it. That’s what I love about God’s Word– it is so organic, malleable, and powerful. It’s able to bring LIFE to any situation we’re facing.

In this passage, Jeremiah is complaining to God about how long he has had to face an enemy, seemingly without any help from God. He even accuses God of failing him in his time of need. Sound familiar? But guess what God’s response was to Jeremiah… “Trust Me.” I know that seems like such an extraneous instruction, one that we hear often, especially when we don’t understand what God is doing. But trusting His faithfulness is the golden ticket to what ever we need from Him. No effort is required on our part. He simply wants us to trust that He loves us and will deliver us.

This particular passage of Scripture is best digested as a combination of various translations. Below, I’ve paraphrased the verses from a few different Bible versions. I hope they open your eyes to what God  has to say about perpetual pain in our lives.

[Jeremiah says] You know where I am, God! You know, understand, and care for me. Remember what I’m doing here! Visit me and avenge me. Take my side against this enemy of mine. Don’t stand back while it ruins me. Just look at the abuse I’m taking! Don’t let my joy slip away while I wait on You.

When I found Your words, I devoured them. Your words made me glad. Your words are what sustain me; they are food to my hungry soul. They bring joy to my sorrowing heart and delight me. How proud I am to bear your name, O Lord. 

Yet, You have failed me in my time of need! You have let this issue continue far too long. Why is my pain perpetual and my wound incurable, refusing to be healed? Will this never stop hurting me? You are like a deceitful brook, like waters that fail and are uncertain. Your help seems like a seasonal mountain brook—sometimes a flood, sometimes as dry as a bone.  

The Lord replied:

“Stop this foolishness and talk some sense! Return to trusting Me. If you return and give up this mistaken tone of distrust and despair, then I will give you again a settled place of quiet and safety. And if you cleanse your own heart from unworthy and unwarranted suspicions concerning My faithfulness, I will make you like a fortified, bronze wall— strong and impenetrable by troubles. Speak worthy, not worthless, words! You are to influence those troubles by speaking to them; by speaking what I have said.  Do not remain silent and thereby let troubles influence you. They will fight against you, but they will not prevail over you, for I am with you to save and deliver you.”

[Paraphrased from Message, Amplified, Living, and NIV Bibles]

Here are three things that I gleaned from this passage that you can implement in dealing with perpetual pain:

  1. Make a decision to trust God, no matter what. Get rid of the attitudes and words of distrust and despair. (Philippians 4:6-8)
  2. Determine to view God as always being faithful. As a friend once told me, being faithful means you always say “Yes.” (2 Corinthians 1:20)
  3. Choose to ensure your conversations with others reflect what God has said about your deliverance. Speak worthy, not worthless, words! (Proverbs 4:20-22)

Now that you’ve read how God corrected and encouraged Jeremiah about his pain (and gave him hope!), what will you do to address the pain you’re experiencing today? I’d love to hear from you. Leave me a note about what you’ll do!

 

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles | FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Sarah’s DUI

Sarah's DUI

Did you know that Sarah had a DUI thousands of years ago?  Her DUI was, of course, not driving while intoxicated/under the influence; it was “Deciding Under the Influence” – of doubt. Sarah made some life-changing, not-so-good decisions under the influence of doubt. Her strong incredulity about God’s promise of a son came back to bite her. Because it was taking so long for her to see the manifestation of the son God had promised them, doubt started to cloud her judgment. She made a doubt-influenced decision to help God keep His promise.

The details of Sarah’s DUI and the consequences of it were not pretty. You can read her story in Genesis 16. Doubting God’s goodness and His faithfulness to keep His word influenced her to offer her Egyptian slave, Hagar, to Abraham. Sarah decided to have her husband to take Hagar as a wife and have sex with her so that the slave could produce the heir that Abraham so desperately wanted. And of course, Abraham gladly cooperated! He probably thought that he was winning all the way around—sex with a “pretty young thing” AND producing the son he always wanted. But that was not God’s plan. As a result of this DUI, Sarah did not experience God’s promised gift as quickly as she thought.

God’s plan was for Sarah to birth a son. A surrogate was not going to bring forth the child of promise that He had planned for Sarah and Abraham. Even though it looked impossible, even though it took a long time, God’s plan was still the best plan and He did not need Sarah to run interference and attempt to force His plan to come to fruition.

Have you ever had a DUI like Sarah’s? Are there times when you struggle because you’re making a decision under the influence of doubt?

Decide to rest in God’s promise. Decide to be still and know Him as God of your circumstances. Your best efforts can never measure up to what He can do to bring good things your way!

 

 

Image from Springfield News Sun

Thoughts Get Stuck in the Muck

thoughts in quicksand

Sometimes you get stuck in the muck and mire of your own mind.

Do you ever find yourself thinking renegade thoughts? You know, those thoughts that really don’t line up with what God has said about you as a believer in Jesus and as a possessor of what He died to give you. Sometimes thoughts can come to mind for the sole purpose of bringing you down.  You know where those thoughts come from…right? NOT from God! They come from your enemy, Satan. They come to make you feel stuck in the muck of your circumstances. Think about them long enough and you’ll find yourself  believing that your situation can never change.

But there’s a solution to this problem. There’s a way to become unstuck. How? By resting in God’s promises, trusting that what God has said is what will come to pass in your life. Use His words as your tool and weapon. Here are a few of the many important things God has said about you. Begin to shape your thoughts around them so you won’t get stuck. Believe what He’s said, act as if it’s true, speak your agreement with His words,expect them to come to fruition, and be determined to stand with gratitude until they do. Trust that what He has said is your unshakable truth [Isaiah 55:11].

God has said:

You’re loved by Him just as much as He loves Jesus. [John 17:23]

You’re forgiven. [Colossians 1:13-14]

You’re healed, by Jesus’ stripes. [1 Peter 2:24; Psalm 107:20]

You’re an heir to the blessing of Abraham (which includes having children). [Galatians 3:13-14; Deuteronomy 7:14]

You’re already victorious, because you are in Christ, the ultimate conqueror. [Romans 8:37]

 

What do you say to your renegade thoughts?

Release your faith and say what God has said!

 

 

An Adoption Story of Hope

I subscribe to a number of emailed newsletters that help me become a better author, a better business woman, and especially, a better person. I recently received one from life coach, Valorie Burton. In it, she shared exciting and encouraging news—along with her struggles of conceiving over the age of 40 and a miscarriage. This is her personal story of how her dream to become a mommy has come true. I share it, with her permission, because I think it will encourage you to not give up hope, even if adoption is is not the path to parenthood that you choose.



 Valorie’s Story:

My lifelong dream has come true. Our lives have changed dramatically and beautifully in the last month. Since marrying my husband in 2013, I’ve been a “bonus” mom to two sweet, energetic, loving little girls. And now, God has seen fit to expand our family with a beautiful baby boy we’ve been privileged to adopt!  That’s right. I’ve become a mommy.

If you’ve read my books or followed me for a while, you know this has been a dream deferred, but I have never given up on the vision I’ve sensed deep in my spirit for marriage and family.  At times, I have felt frustrated, helpless, and discouraged, but I refused to give up hope. I could not.  To give up hope would be to give up on God. As I stand in the midst of this vision of love that has unfolded, I feel led to share my lessons learned so I can encourage you to persevere towards your own vision – whatever that vision might be:   

  1. Keep hoping.
    Without hope, there is no vision. When you stop hoping, you start settling. Be relentless and focused. At times, it may even appear you are delusional to keep hoping. So what! Keep believing in your vision and make your decisions, whether about relationships, finances, career, that honor your ultimate goal.
      
  2. Don’t let disappointments become your destination.
    Separation and divorce. Navigating the tumultuous dating landscape of Atlanta. Trying to conceive over 40. Miscarrying twins. All have been my reality in the last seven years. Each could have become a bitter destination, except for this: I refused to see my disappointments as a permanent destination.  Some were devastating detours. I had to stop journeying for a while and recover. But I made a decision to be better and not bitter after each one. I made a decision not to get stuck staring at the obstacles before me, but to look up and remember the vision in my heart. That vision compelled me to keep hoping and keep moving forward.
      
  3. Be open to a path that looks different than you expected.
    It is easy to be rigid about how your dream must come together. Don’t. Be open to divine orchestration. Let go of your need to control the “how” of your vision so you can stay focused on the “why” – which leads me to this last point …
      
  4. Stay focused on the PURPOSE of your vision more than the excitement of it.
    At points, I began to doubt whether I would ever become a mother, and before that, whether I would ever find the kind of love I believe in.  A transformational message emerged from my doubt, though. I asked myself, “What if you never marry?” “What if you never have a child?” And I answered my “What if” questions. Here’s what I realized:  The world would not come to an end, so I better learn to be happy regardless of the outcome! If I didn’t get married or have children, I would live my life single without children and I would choose to have an incredible life. There are many women I greatly admire who are single without children – and happy, purposeful, loved and loving. So then, what would be the purpose of marriage and family in my life?  That is the question I needed to answer for myself.  I don’t believe that having a child is about me becoming a mom. I believe it is about having the blessed opportunity to nurture and grow a child God has seen fit to place in my care.  What an honor. It is about him, not me.  And perhaps that is the shift in thinking that shifted my life and brought us this amazing, perfect little boy for us. 


A Call to Action for you:  Don’t give up on God (Genesis 18:14). Stay connected to Him through His promises found in His Word. Hear His quiet voice within you giving you wisdom about how to proceed along your path. You can find more encouragement in A Seed of Hope: God’s Promises of Fertility.

A Seed of Hope
A Seed of Hope: God’s Promises of Fertility by Evangeline Colbert