Hope= the confident expectation that GOOD things will happen.
Sometimes, we can run low on how much hope we have about ever having a baby. Here’s a “booster shot” for increasing your personal level of hope:
Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you,plans to give you HOPE and a future.”
Be encouraged…keep your hope alive!
When I was on the frontline of the battle against infertility, Mother’s Day was difficult to celebrate. Of course, I honored my own mother but something inside me yearned for the ability to celebrate it with my own child.
I wanted to experience pregnancy. I wanted to watch my tummy grow. I wanted to feel the baby kicking and moving inside of me. I wanted to be the one who could console my child when no one else could. But it wasn’t happening…
Thankfully, I had a husband who was understanding and got me through the day without tears (he was good at distracting me). And I had a mother who encouraged me to never give up hope. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.” Even though he was referring to the Civil Rights struggle, it is applicable to this personal struggle of dealing with childlessness. With infertility, the finite disappointment rolls around on a monthly basis, but don’t allow it to make you lose hope in having a child.
Childlessness can drain you emotionally, if you let it. It can sink you into great despair, if you let it. I encourage you to find creative ways to maintain ongoing, infinite hope.
How will you cope with Mother’s Day 2012? Please share with us your ways of maintaining hope!
Champions are sometimes born and not necessarily made. Examples would be Isaac, Samson, and John the Baptist. Each of them were born of mothers who had suffered with infertility. Each of these sons made a champion-sized difference in their nation.
Their mothers, Sarah, Manoah’s wife, and Elizabeth, respectively, each thought they would never give birth to a child, after years of “trying.” But God had a different thought. He saw the future He had planned for them. It was a plan of fertility: a future of overcoming barrenness. It was a plan based on His love for them. When they each BELIEVED in His plan and His love, they each conceived and successfully delivered a healthy baby.
Want to know God’s love-plan for you? You’ll find it in the Bible—His Word. It contains many promises for fertility and examples of women who overcame barrenness/ infertility.
I encourage you to trust God and BELIEVE in His love-plan for you.
Do you ever get tired of “shoulding” all over yourself?
I do. I should have gotten up and walked this morning. I should have set the timer to get off the computer so I could get other important things done. I should have made a better choice for a snack this afternoon. I should have told my hairdresser to not cut so much of my hair off. I should have told each of my children “I love you” this morning.
I could “should” all over myself all day,everyday, if I allowed myself to do so. I could beat myself up about so many little things and big things. But I have to daily remind myself that there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ (Romans 8:1). If I make a mistake or if I make a wrong choice, I don’t have to re-live it over and over again in my head. If Jesus doesn’t hold things against me, why do I? That’s not to say that I shouldn’t try to make right choices; it just means that I can find peace in Him when I don’t.
If you condemn yourself because of a life changing choice you made years ago, or even yesterday, STOP! You’re the only one on that ride going to nowhere! Jesus is on the ride that is headed toward the destination of grace, forgiveness and peace and He wants you to join Him. So stop “shoulding” all over yourself and take a ride on the GRACE side.
Is your lifestyle one of anticipating the worst case scenario or do you expect good things to happen? As humans, it’s easy for us to see and talk about the negative aspects of our lives. But as a Christian, it should be easy for us to see AND talk about the positive things in our lives. After all, we have an “unfair advantage.” We have the favor of God!
The favor of God is His abundant, unearned grace, and it is unaffected by anything that we do. As believers in Jesus Christ, we have the abundance of God continually available to us for every area of our lives! It’s up to us to believe that it is ours to receive. Even when going through the throes of infertility, believe that the favor of God is working in your life. Despite what the evidence/medical report/family history is in your life, anticipate good results. Believe that the favor of God is working on your behalf. Believe that He is for you and not against you.
As you continue to believe, the things you say will be more positive. As you continue to believe, you’ll anticipate the good, more and more because your focus will change. Your focus will not be on the negative circumstances of your life but on the all-sufficient grace and love of God. And that…is ALL good.
When faced with a thought filled with doom and gloom, and it repeatedly comes to mind, it’s hard to maintain a hope-filled focus. That’s exactly when we must remind ourselves that we can choose what we think about. We can dwell on the thought that brings us down and continue to ride that wave of despair, OR, we can switch gears and begin to think about the Truth.
Truth always prevails. It is unshakable. It is unchangeable. It is the foundation upon which we can build a thought-life that brings waves of joy and not sorrow, hope and not despair.
The only Truth I know is the Word of God. It is filled with hope and love. It is food for good thoughts!
“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” ~~Philippians 4:8 NLT
Finally, an encouraging devotional for those suffering with infertility! My new ebook, “A Seed of Hope—God’s Promises of Fertility,” is from my perspective of having overcome infertility. It uplifts and brings hope to the reader through daily readings with the premise that nothing is too hard for God, not even infertility.
You’ll be encouraged along your journey to get through this season of childlessness by relying on, speaking, and trusting in the Word of God and His love for you. Please let me know what you think after you take a look inside “A Seed of Hope” .
Don’t ignore the spiritual aspect of infertility.
It is so easy to lose focus on the spiritual nature of infertility when the physical aspect overtakes your daily life. You and your spouse can become so obsessed with finding the cause and the cure for you situation that it can rob you of your peace. When you’re not experiencing peace, you’re likely to ignore the one thing that can bring about the solution you’re looking for.
It is important to strengthen yourself spiritually while dealing with infertility. Acknowledge the need to ask God for wisdom when faced with overcoming the enemy called “Infertility.” It may seem like a Goliath-sized enemy to you, but for God, “Infertility” is already a defeated foe. It is not too hard to break or destroy. God said so when he defeated infertility in Sarah’s life (see Genesis 18:14).
Luke 18:27 states, “And he [Jesus] said, The things which are impossible with men are possible WITH (in close proximity to) God”{emphasis mine}. Join yourself WITH Him by asking for wisdom in the decisions you make, by reading His word, by speaking and meditating His Word.
Trust that God’s Word is true for you. It will bring you guidance, comfort, and ultimately, greater peace.
“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.” ~~ Isaiah 26:3
“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” ~~ John 14:27
The more I learn of the love of Jesus, specifically His love for me, I am astounded by its depth, height, width and length. I see more clearly now that His love for me covers everything; it is complete and perfect. There are no holes in His love for me, no void spaces. So if nothing is missing in His love for me, why am I not always confident in the victory that love has already provided?
Maybe I need to look more at what He’s done instead of what I’ve done or what I need to do (I can sometimes have a l-o-n-g “to do” list to correct my circumstances). Maybe I need to allow Him to be in control so that I can rest. Everything that He’s done has been based on His love for me. Every bit of punishment inflicted on Him before and at the cross was because He did not want me to experience it. Every bit of scourging was endured for me. Every sickness and “condition” was taken on by His body for me. He satisfied every requirement of the Law so I wouldn’t have to. He left nothing undone and did everything perfectly. What a love!
No matter the circumstances that I find myself enduring, I’m determined to choose to look to Jesus’ love for me, to have confidence in it, to trust it. I’m determined to rest in the knowledge that His love for me has done enough to get me through.
Be encouraged!