Category: Infertility

Don't give up on God

Even if You Feel Like You Should Give Up on God – DON’T!

Posted on by Evangeline

This is a RELOADED post–one that I originally shared a year ago. Lately I’m meeting more women who are on the verge of hopelessness. They’re ready to give up on God and His promises of fertility. Are you feeling like those women? Take a moment to read and remember this promise from God:

You shall be blessed above all peoples;
there will be no male or female barren (childless, infertile) among you.
Deuteronomy 7:14 AMP

Now, read on for some additional encouragement!

The enemy would like nothing better than for us to give up on God.  To give up on His love. To give up on our God-given desires and goals.

When we feel like God is not following through on His promises…

When we don’t see the results we anticipated…

We need a plan. A plan that we can count on to pull us through the tears, the fears, and the dread that comes when we experience delay. I think the best plan for maintaining hope and for changing any circumstance in our lives always needs to include the power of God’s Word. The Word is what helps us remember that the God of the universe loves us without fail and is always on our side. The Bible makes it clear that God loves us with a no-matter-what love. Incorporating His promises into our plan makes it an effective battle plan so that we maintain hope and strongly resist giving up.

The Alternative to Giving Up

David encouraged himself when he was on the verge of giving up (1 Samuel 30:6).  You could do the same, couldn’t you?

Here are 4 examples from Scripture that you can use as a part of your battle plan to ultimately live as the victor God created you to be. Use them to keep yourself encouraged about experiencing what God has promised:

  • “But as for you, be strong and do not give up.” – 2 Chronicles 15:7
  • “Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial.” – James 1:12
  • “Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.” – Mark 10:27

  • “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then.” – Ephesians 6:12-14

Bottom line, don’t give up on God!

What other scriptures would you add to this list? Please share one in the comments! 🙂 

The Word is what helps us remember that the God of the universe is on our side and loves us with a no-matter-what love. It makes our plan into an effective battle plan so that we maintain hope and strongly resist giving up. Click To Tweet

Exciting News!! Listen and Watch to Get the Update

Posted on by Evangeline

I’m thrilled to share this exciting news with you because I know that you can greatly benefit from it!

Pregnancy Journal

The most recent book I’ve written is a pregnancy journal. WHY? Because when you become pregnant after a fertility struggle, fear creeps in to color how you view and experience your pregnancy. This weekly journal, Conceived by Grace Pregnancy Journal, will help you stay faith-filled so that you enjoy the pregnancy journey.

My co-author, Maria Mwangi, and I decided to share all the pertinent info via a video chat.

Click here to watch the video


Maria and Evangeline

 

AND, here’s more exciting news–

Join us on Saturday, August 22nd, at our virtual fertility event as mighty women and men of God share how they became victorious over infertility/miscarriage. You’ll also be encouraged by God’s promises for your path to motherhood.

 

CBG Event Flyer

 

 

You’ll find more information at www.ConceivedByGrace.com

7 fertility faith actions

7 Actions You Can Take to Build Your Faith for Fertility

Posted on by Evangeline

I recognize that faith is not always easy to execute. Sometimes we need faith-boosters–especially when dealing with dark/difficult circumstances in life, like infertility.

Here are seven actions you can take to boost your confidence in God’s promises of fertility. Be intentional about taking Scripture-based actions as you prepare for pregnancy and parenthood. Do them and you’ll increase your faith that His fertility promises are true for YOU.

7 Actions to Build Your Faith

  1. Speak God’s Word daily. Find scriptures that are directly related to overcoming infertility and speak them out loud. Decide that because you are made in God’s image you will do as God does…declaring the desired end results from the beginning of a matter (Isaiah 46:9, 10). Nothing is too hard for Him so speak His Word into any dark circumstances so that LIFE and LIGHT can be brought into them (Job 22:28).
  2. Pray together. If you haven’t already, pray together with your husband, asking God to make hubby’s sperm healthy and motile, your uterus ready for impregnation, to have a healthy and safe pregnancy, and to deliver a healthy baby. Ask to become wise and godly parents from the beginning. And then, get together to pray prayers of thanksgiving often, trusting that God has heard your request and answered it (Psalm 138:3; Philippians 4:6-7).
  3. Prepare your body:Get a health check-up from your doctor or health care professional. If you already have weight-caused health issues, execute a plan to help you get to a healthy weight. Begin to take prenatal vitamins, especially a formula that includes folic acid. Eliminate sources of caffeine in what you eat and drink. Some studies have shown that caffeine intake may affect fertility. Eat more healthy foods—leafy vegetables, fruit, whole grains, and lean protein. Eliminate smoking cigarettes/marijuana. Eliminate all alcoholic beverages. Begin an exercise routine to strengthen your muscles. Learn how to do Kegel exercises and do them consistently to strengthen your pelvic muscles for a vaginal delivery.  ***(This is not medical advice. These are general suggestions applicable to most people.  You should consult a health care professional for advice that is specific to your needs.)***
  4. Watch your words. When you’re having conversations and hear yourself mention something negative about the status of your fertility, make a course correction! Use what I call “the Holy BUT”. In English grammar, the word “but” implies that you’re negating what was said previously. You may have said something like,”We’ve been trying for long! Seems like we’ll never get pregnant.” You can course-correct and say, “I may not be pregnant “BUT” God said that none shall be barren and that includes me” (Exodus 23:26).
  5. Take Communion regularly at your home. You can take communion at home as well as at church. As you receive communion, remember your faith works by love (Galatians 5:6). Be ever conscious of God’s love for you. Jesus died so that you can live in His righteousness knowing that you have been made a worthy recipient of the Father’s unconditional and unending love, kindness, grace, and goodness. Jesus’ body was broken so that yours can be whole!
  6. Consistently speak God’s Word without fear and doubt. When fear and doubt come knocking at the door of your mind, repel them with gratitude. Take a moment to thank God for what He has done for you through Jesus’ finished work on the cross and through His resurrection (Ephesians 2:6).
  7. Pray in advance that all of your children will choose at a young age to accept Jesus. Pray that all of your children will be Spirit-filled and Spirit-led.

For a deeper dive into Scriptural encouragement about your fertility, join me in the Fertility Hope Huddle. We’ll gather online in March 2020! Click HERE to get the Fertility Hope Huddle details.

hope - a healthy habit

How Will You Enhance Your Life and Fertility with Healthy Habits in 2020?

Posted on by Evangeline

What are some of the healthy habits you resolved to develop/keep during 2020?

Did you know that when you have hope it operates to enhance your fertility? Researchers say that positivity– having hope– directly impacts the function of our biological systems. This means that maintaining a higher level of optimism may possibly affect your fertility in a positive way.

Optimism is a healthy habit!

One way to stay optimistic is to use scripturally-based affirmations that fill you with hope about God’s promises of fertility. Here are a couple:

Deuteronomy 7:13,14—”And He will love you and bless you and multiply you; He will also bless the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your land, your grain and your new wine and your oil, the increase of your cattle and the offspring of your flock, in the land of which He swore to your fathers to give you. You shall be blessed above all peoples; there shall not be a male or female barren among you or among your livestock.”

“God’s desire is that I be fertile and not barren. I live in the delight of His desire and His faithfulness to keep His Word.”

Hebrews 11:11—“Because of faith also Sarah herself received physical power to conceive a child, even when she was long past the age for it, because she considered God who had given her the promise to be reliable and trustworthy and true to His word.” [AMP]

“Through faith and confidence in Jesus’ love for me, I receive from God the physical power His Word imparts to me to conceive a child.”

Repeat these out loud on a consistent basis, along with others you develop. It can be helpful to write them and put them in a place where you’ll regularly see them. They’ll be a visible reminder to affirm God’s Word and to stay focused on hope-filled thoughts about your fertility.

More Fertility Affirmations

If you need some suggestions about other Scripture-based affirmations to use that are specific to your fertility, check out my Bible reading plan on YouVersion. I’m thrilled that there have been thousands of readers that have used it as they look for victory over infertility.

Blessings to you as you add this to your arsenal of healthy habits. What else do you do as a healthy habit?

victory over infertility -breakthrough - sticky note

My Story of Victory Over Infertility – Part 2

Posted on by Evangeline

I’m so glad I didn’t give up or give in to the doubts and fears that bombarded me during the season of infertility. You can read more about that in part 1 of my story of victory over infertility. I had friends who I trusted to give me solid and godly  advice during that season. One friend shared that I should read the accounts in the Bible of women who had overcome infertility. These were real-life stories of victory that I could hold on to, trusting that if God did it for them, He would do it for me. He would be true to His word and keep His promises of fertility. I kept a journal during this time to record my thoughts and prayers, Scripture, and experiences.

Make sure you read my related (exciting) announcement at the end of this blog post!

My Story Continues…

After five days of not having a period in November of 1987, I did a home pregnancy test and the test stick turned blue— its result was positive! I could hardly believe it. After all that time of “trying,” after all the failed attempts and negative test results, I was finally pregnant! Once it actually happened, it did not seem real. But Freeman and I celebrated (very calmly). That following Saturday, we were to play in a volleyball game with some church members. I chose to not play. I did not want to take any chances of falling or someone bumping into me.

After the game, I got a phone call from a close friend wondering what was going on since I didn’t play. We told her the good news and swore her to secrecy. 🙂  I couldn’t allow myself to completely trust the test result until I could confirm it with a test at the doctor’s office. I went in, having already told myself not to be too disappointed if it produced a negative result. The fear was real!

Finally Pregnant!

As I sat nervously in the examination room, the nurse came in and said with a big grin, “You’re pregnant!” All the nurses in the office were so happy. They had seen me go through many pregnancy tests that turned out negative. Even my doctor was surprised that it finally happened! I was to meet Freeman for lunch that day and I could hardly wait to give him the good news. After we finished eating, I showed him the test results and congratulated him for officially being a daddy. He cried! It was a precious moment.

Just a week later, I experienced some spotting—small amounts of vaginal bleeding. Of course my first thought was, “Am I going to lose the baby?” Yes, even though I had experienced victory over infertility and had finally gotten pregnant, there was still fear of an attack from the devil on my body and now, also on my baby’s life.
I had to choose whether to give in to the fear or trust God. It was my choice as to whether to accept the fearful thoughts, to cast them down, or just ignore them. I certainly did not want to give in and live with fearful thoughts. Ignoring them would have left them harboring in the recesses of my mind and having a place to silently grow into even larger, more fearful thoughts. I had to cast them down by re-directing my thoughts to God’s love and the power of His Word.

Jesus ALREADY Did It

As the spotting continued during the next several weeks, I wrote in my journal that I had to remind myself of Colossians 2:15—“Jesus spoiled principalities and made a show of them openly”. He did that for me and for my baby growing inside of me. I had to trust that this baby would make it through a full term pregnancy. Thankfully, we also had prayer support from many people which boosted our trust in God over the next few months as the spotting continued and even some cramping began.

But God was faithful to His Word that Jesus had given us victory over infertility and childlessness! My pregnancy proceeded successfully. Our precious baby boy was born in June 1988, completely healthy and handsome.

#ttc- I had to remind myself of Colossians 2:15---“Jesus spoiled principalities and made a show of them openly”. He did that for me AND for my baby growing inside of me. Click To Tweet

In time, God added to our family. He blessed us with a healthy and handsome son two years later. We were blessed with a healthy and beautiful daughter four years later. Those pregnancies occurred as soon as we started “trying” and both progressed smoothly.

God is your source of breakthrough. He can truly make a way when there seems to be no way.

Victory over infertility is indeed possible!

ANNOUNCING…

Fear, worry, and doubt have an insidious way of creeping into our minds and hearts as we navigate pregnancy after experiencing infertility, miscarriage, or infant loss. That’s why I have co-authored a new book, Conceived by Grace: A No-Fear Pregnancy Journal, with a friend who experienced multiple miscarriages. We know from experience that focusing on God’s love and power is a game-changer.

We’re excited about providing this pregnancy journal so that you keep your focus on the truth of God’s Word during pregnancy. You can record your thoughts, prayers, and experiences, read Words of Wisdom, and rely on scriptures provided to empower you. It’s coming in early 2020 so that you can be encouraged to expect victory throughout your entire pregnancy.

Fill out the form below for more info about how you can get Conceived by Grace!

overcoming infertility

My Story of Victory Over Infertility – Part 1

Posted on by Evangeline

Since I started coaching women about how to enhance their fertility, many of them have shared with me that hearing the stories of women who have overcome infertility markedly increases their hope. Today, I’d like to share my story.

My Story of Victory over Infertility

I struggled with “unknown factors” of infertility. I was in my late 20’s when we started “trying” so my age really wasn’t a factor. There was never a firm diagnosis that specifically confirmed why I was not getting pregnant. I did however have a gynecologist tell me that I may never get pregnant. That was devastating news.

As a woman, I felt inadequate. I couldn’t do the ONE thing that women can do that men can’t—get pregnant. At times, I felt as if people pitied me, even though they did not. Sometimes I felt like an outcast, even though my friends welcomed me in their activities. But that was the painful part.

Having reached the age where all my close friends had children meant being around their kids whenever I attended any of their activities. I loved their children and had fun with them. But I felt out of place not having a child of my own playing along with all the others. I remember trying to convince myself that it was OK…but it wasn’t! It hurt!

I went through a battery of tests to determine why I was not getting pregnant. None of the tests produced conclusive results. I did have fibroids and as a result, had very heavy periods. There were also D&C surgeries and infections to live through. Going through the journey of infertility and all that comes along with it was not what I had signed up for in my “perfect” life.

I Couldn’t Give Up or Give In

But I decided that it was not going to give authority to infertility and allow it to be a source of depression nor a reason to become a hermit. I would choose to enjoy life as it came and to do whatever it took to make the best of each day.

Doctor’s reports were a source of frustration but God’s report in the Bible was my source of hope. Choosing to stand on God’s Word was an easy choice; actually doing it was not. It was a battle against my will, which wanted to do the easy thing and give up.

Making a stand for anything requires that you fight back against numerous attacks, not just one. I had to do just that- –fight against numerous thoughts that were fearful, doubtful, and shame-filled everyday. Yes, I was ashamed that I could not get pregnant. No one else made me feel that way. It was self-inflicted.

#ttc - I was ashamed that I could not get pregnant. No one else made me feel that way. It was self-inflicted. Click To Tweet

Isn’t it amazing what our own mind can do to inflict emotional pain on ourselves? The Word of God was my way out of that inner turmoil. I decided to keep “trying” no matter how long it took and watch God work it out.

Thankfully, God gave me wisdom through various friends and family members. They each encouraged me to keep my hope high and to not give in to the fear of never having children.

For the rest of the story, read Part 2 of my story of victory over infertility. 🙂

Staying Inside of God’s Circle of Blessing

Posted on by Evangeline

Do you sometimes feel that going through infertility is like experiencing famine in the land? Today, I’m sharing an excerpt from my devotional, A Seed of Hope: God’s Promises of Fertility, that addresses that issue.

This devotion is entitled “God’s Circle of Blessing“–

circle of blessingThe Living Bible Translation of Psalm 25:13 says, “He shall live within God’s circle of blessing, and his children shall inherit the earth.” To whom is this passage referring? The previous verse tells us…the person who reverences God.

Living in God’s circle of blessing enables us to enjoy the best in life even when circumstances around us tell, and sometimes yell, otherwise. Isaac, Abraham’s son, was a great example of living in the circle of blessing. The Bible’s account in Genesis 26:1-13 tells how there was a famine in the country where Isaac lived and he wondered if he should leave like so many others and go to Egypt where there was no famine.

God told Isaac to stay and that He would be with him in his obedience. God promised him increase in all areas of life, including children. So in the midst of his country’s famine, despair, lack, and death, Isaac was blessed with extreme abundance because he stayed where God wanted him—in His circle of blessing. Infertility is like a famine—extreme hunger and despair—except it’s for a child. Just as Isaac experienced great bounty in the midst of famine, so can you, when you choose to remain in God’s circle of blessing even as your circumstances scream “famine.”

How to Stay in the Circle of Blessing

You can live in God’s circle of blessing by keeping the ears of your heart open to His Word. Hear Him as He speaks to you through it. Receive the Word by faith, as personal promises from God to you. Receive His wonderful blessings by saying “thank you” to Him for the promises you find in his Word for your child. Repeatedly speak His Word, His Truth, over your life. When we speak the Word, we’re in agreement with God. Receive His blessings by living in His Word and resting in His grace.

No matter what the doctor’s reports say, you don’t have to be stuck in the famine of infertility. Declare that you live in God’s circle of blessing because famine can’t exist there. Jesus is God of abundant joy! Nothing is too hard for Him to change; therefore He can change your circumstance of infertility. His Truth, His Word, can bring extreme abundance in its most wonderful form—the blessing of a child.

Speak the Word: I choose to stay in God’s circle of blessing.  He is my source of everything good.

More Encouragement: Galatians 3:14; Hebrews 6:14

If you’d like to have more devotions like this at your fingertips, so that you can encourage yourself on a daily basis,

click here to order A Seed of Hope.

A Seed of hope

Take Time to Insert Positivity into Your Day

Posted on by Evangeline

Infertility stressed me out when I dealt with it. Some days there seemed to be no positivity in my thoughts or my words. Are you experiencing the same thing? The absolute best thing I can offer you during the stressful season of infertility is God’s Word. It really is the ultimate source of peace, comfort, guidance, and positivity that you’re looking for. You’re not alone! God hears you. His heart aches when you feel like you don’t hear Him. He’s right there in His Word. All the answers you’re looking for are there.

Are you willing to commit to look for them and then use them?

positivityTake time to insert some positivity into you day–every day. Start by printing this blog post and reading the scriptures below out loud many times each day. Add to them as you look for and find other Scripture verses that apply to your situation.

Positivity from Scripture

“Rather, it was simply that the LORD loves you, and he was keeping the oath he had sworn.” – Deuteronomy 7:8

“I am in them and You are in me… You love them as much as You love me.” – John 17:23

“Jesus looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible.” – Matthew 19:26

“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on You!” – Isaiah 26:3

“LORD, sustain me as you promised, that I may live! Do not let my hope be crushed.” – Psalm 119:116

“That is what the Scriptures mean when God told him, “I have made you the father of many nations.” This happened because Abraham believed in the God who brings the dead back to life and who creates new things out of nothing.” – Romans 4:17

“Praise the LORD who has given rest to His people… just as He promised. Not one word has failed of all His wonderful promises.” – 1 Kings 8:56

“Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise Him again–my Savior and my God!” – Psalm 42:11

“He will love you and bless you, and He will give you many children.” – Deuteronomy 7:13

“If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.” – James 1:5

“It was by faith that even Sarah was able to have a child, though she was barren and was too old. She believed that God would keep his promise.“ – Hebrews 11:11

Stay in God’s Word and I know that you’ll begin to experience the lifting and the peace that you’re craving for.

When will you insert positivity into your day? Set an appointment with yourself to do it and then follow through.

feeling hopeless choose hope

Here’s Help if You’re Feeling Hopeless About Your Fertility (or Anything Else)

Posted on by Evangeline

If you’re feeling hopeless about the status of your fertility, you can find help in many ways and from many sources. Sources like your gynecologist, a fertility doctor, a close friend, your parents, books, online forums, etc. But one thing I’m sure of (from personal experience)– the best help will come from God. When you address the spiritual aspect of infertility, you are increasing your opportunity to overcome infertility. And that’s reason to be hopeful!

If you feel hopeless, it’s not because there’s no hope available in your life. It’s because you feel there’s none.

Put an End to Feeling Hopeless

When it feels hard to find hope, look for ways to change things. In the Bible’s account of Abraham and Sarah’s infertility, we see how in spite of hopeless circumstances, Abraham chose to maintain hope.

When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw he couldn’t do but on what God said he would do. And so he was made father of a multitude of peoples. Romans 4:18 MSG

There are always actions we can take to move past hopelessness and feel better.

  • If a hopeless thought comes to your mind that things are never going to get better, remember a situation in your life when things looked hopeless but did improve. Doing this simple exercise will remind you how feelings will typically pass over time.
  • Express gratitude regularly. Appreciating the present moment will take your attention off of feeling hopeless.

So it boils down to making a choice. You can choose to pay attention to your feelings and have an attitude of hopelessness or, you can choose to focus on God’s love for you and what He has said in His Word. Yes! God has spoken about infertility. He’s even made promises about fertility. Here’s a good one to know:

And He will love you, bless you, and multiply you; He will also bless the fruit of your body…there shall not be male or female barren among you. Deuteronomy 7:13-14 AMPC

Therefore, choose to remember these thoughts when you are feeling hopeless: You are deeply loved. You are empowered by God’s Word. In Jesus, you are a recipient of the outcome of His promises.

Those are all reasons to be hopeFULL! 🙂

Feeling hopeless about your fertility? Focus on God's love for you and what He has said in His Word. Yes, God has spoken about fertility! Click To Tweet

What’s the Self-Image You’re Holding On To?

Posted on by Evangeline

A couple of years ago, I became a Certified Professional Coach. I love seeing lives transformed! In working with clients, I’ve gotten to see what an important role the self-image we hold of ourselves really plays. Here’s a “reloaded” post that you may find a bit challenging but I’m sure it will be helpful.

So, I ask you, what are you calling yourself in your everyday conversations…Infertile or Overcomer? Because that determines how you see yourself and it establishes a foundation for your future!

How you see yourself is important in the grand scheme of life. The images that we hold in our minds are typically what we will experience or become.

Do you see yourself as an infertile woman or as an overcomer of infertility? Even if you are currently experiencing infertility, you can choose to hold a positive picture in your mind’s eye of you being an overcomer!

Do you label yourself as an infertile woman when you’re having conversations with your friends or family? Maybe you’ve heard yourself say, “We don’t have kids yet because I’m infertile.” Even in the midst of this difficult season, you can choose to speak words that help you rise above what the Enemy has sent your way.

Yes, your thoughts and your words are really that influential!

One way to tip the self-image in your mind and the words from your mouth toward more positivity is through gratitude. When you choose to express thankfulness, you begin to think of even more things to be grateful for.

How you see yourself - Be thankful

 

Gratitude is also what brings you into God’s presence (Psalm 100:4).

Being thankful on purpose results in a shift from negativity and fear to positivity and faith.

You can be grateful that He WILL finish what He has started in your life (Philippians 1:6).

Being thankful on purpose results in focusing on the good. What you focus on expands!

As you cast all your anxieties onto Jesus, you will experience more inner peace
(1 Peter 1:7).

Being thankful helps you to more easily recognize the gift of GRACE that God has poured out to you.

When  your words carry and reflect more of the power of life instead of death, you’ll find that you think of your circumstances very differently.

How you see yourself–your self-image–is important. It influences your quality of life. Ask God to help you see yourself the way He sees you–> whole, victorious, and loved.

Even if you are currently experiencing infertility, you can choose to hold a positive picture in your mind's eye of you being an overcomer! Click To Tweet